Mommy has just posted this on our front door:

Wanted: A live-out nanny (unless she’s cool with sleeping on the couch) for a 5 mo. old baby genius/website model. Full-time gig. Hours: 7-5, or 6:30-4, or 8-6… something around there. Must be similar to Mary Poppins, (i.e. practically perfect in every way) Must be familiar with such diddies as: The Hokey Pokey, The Apples and Bananas song, Gwen Stefani’s Holla Back Girl, Snoop Dogg’s Beautiful, and anything ever sung by either Julie Andrews or Nick Lachey. Must love to give zerberts, wipe up drool, and watch The Best Week Ever on VH1. Must have own transportation, so we can enjoy outings to Nordstrom and Starbucks twice weekly. Experience required, German/English bilingual speaker preferred. Wages negotiable. And by negotiable, we mean you can stay for dinner. Please inquire within.